Most people want to be liked. Saying “No” does not usually accomplish this, so we avoid it. There are times when it is necessary to do so, however. Remember that it is not WHAT you say, but HOW you say it. Saying “No” can be done in a very tactful and professional manner, helping us to successfully reach our goal. Getting the intended message across can be accomplished if we follow some very simple rules.

1. Be Professional

Be professional and polite at all times. You can decline a request without being rude. Use appropriate and thoughtful verbiage such as, “I apologize that I am unable to help you out this time. I really wish I could.”

2. Provide Reasons

If you simply say “No” to a request without providing an adequate explanation, this will likely put your co-worker on the defense. Your explanation should be brief but clear.

3. Stand Firm

Stand firm on your decision and do not give in. Once you have made your decision clear, it is very important to stand firm. If you cave, you are likely to be expected to do so every time. Protect yourself from falling into this trap.

4. Provide Alternatives

Delegation is a good option. If you are able to provide an alternative to a request, your co-worker is likely to be appeased and not be put off. Consider investigating the option of another employee assisting instead of you.

5. Anticipate Resentment

Receiving resentment is something you should expect and prepare for. Handle it with professionalism and do not take it personally. Remember that you cannot please everyone every time.

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